thoughts to words

Remember a time when christmas meant shopping for new clothes, preparing meals like chapati, and going back to the country to visit the grandparents? I always looked forward to such, the road trips were my favourite, Although being the last born of three, i'd have to settle for the middle seat and suffer through break-necking angles trying to view the scenery. The snacks made the journey more bearable. Imagine sitting through an eight hour drive, with only one stop over. Yes as i look back now my parents were determined, the noise we made and of course being couped up like that the fights were plenty. I remember each of the trips, the memories is what keeps me looking forward each year even though each of us has gone seperate ways. The carols we sang on the road trips remain in my heart, maybe because i remember my dad  humming while we sang over the radio, each of us off key or off tune. The joy my parents and siblings placed each year made us bond and i love each of them to bi

Dawn brings in its good cheer, fragrant with such hope and faith expectant with dreams fulfilled, and desires to be met, Yet we the weak in spirit slumber, afraid of the dark, we stayed up afraid of the light, we slept in Banking on imaginary monsters, Of century old myths, we awaited doom. We cursed the good, embracing what evils we knew In the purest of forms , we succumbed The virtual darkness engulfs, so thick a trial so vein, of wicks the pleas made silently turn to screams hidden emotions begin to show, tears, blood, sweat, name it Shackles of the past tighten the little we had left, we took by the hand, fighting to the death, fighting for sanity rights we had long forgotten, rights we had long surrendered, we  claimed. The hold you had, gone ensnares and traps placed, poof chains and groaning, relief locks and cables, opened windows and doors, unhinged weary hearts, lifted of the past and present, accepted, of the future, a mystery expected a silent

    A  new month brings such realisation to ones life and the year at hand. Something i've learnt over time is the need to be true to your self if anything. The lyrics of  Alanis Morissette, song  'you learn',  gave me such.     Although i have heard the song multiple times before, i really listened to it the other day and saw the need for each and every one of those thing and scenarios she spoke of.    ' Getting your heart trampled on by anyone', Love is a brave act, a war, a bed of roses and so much more than i can imagine. But to love one needs to have courage to survive the thorns and live through the bad days, to give your heart and soul and be open to the one you love. And if your heart gets trampled on, it simply means you've lived and you've learnt.    The best of them are the hot flames, I know that a little too well. The unexpected ones you met on your broken road to greener pastures. Those that crash and burn :-)    You know how you light a ma

A plastered smile, to show the hundreth mile.. ive taken so far to change change in terms of  a new beginning, or somehow a reformed meaning In my yester years, you wiped my tears, the refuge i ran to, cause thats all i had, sarcasm fills the words, as you are the cause of my bloody eyes, and the river that  flows from my eyes, the sense in your repelling... my appealing... got us lost. In this case it hurt more on my side, maybe the one hurting, should recount it all, cause am feeling like a toy ball, maybe the word feeling is wrong all together, cause lately its been my worst enemy. am fighting with myself and that means war, plain and simple, bombs and ammunition, Remind me where i stand, hit me over the head with it, just in case i think you asked.. because you wanted the bond. my tell tale expression, hidden the dissappointment, i weep i havent got a prayer i havent got a care, somehow like a trolley, its me pushing, and like a seed, its easy germi

In the words of Pharrel Williams, 'money can't buy you happiness but happy can get you money', As i was going through some updates i stumbled on this and it got me thinking..in more ways than one that it does make sense. We are so busy trying to attain success, love, happiness, picture perfect dreams and movie lives that we forget to actually enjoy our time and create life rather than a living. You see, when we just relax and embrace the feeling of what we are doing and be happy we can achieve so much more than we had bargained for. For the longest time i did not think this statement could be so meaningful, but it covers my six months of 2014. I had just finished a short course i was doing in college last year and thought to myself, why not take a year off school and see what happens, i guess you'd say i was crazy back then :) But i was seeing life pass me by and there all these things am yet to do and experience so i took the challenge. I added a twist an prom

Wisp of country and simplicity, Toungues crashing, crackling of the wood so exciting,so inviting, warmth fills the air, the darkness quickly fading, you held me, close sweetnothings whispered subtle promses cast, giggles and hands locked, you eyes so intruiging, capturing my whole being, wave after wave of thirst quenched, needs i didnt know i had, playing with fire... as the wood ave in to the fire, the wind swept through, wooing us on, we backtracked to our roots, words lost in translation, sounds became one with the wild, a song of tranquile, Ah, the release calling me as i came,closer straight towards...reality the blurr coming into focus the ghosts of the past become one with the wind, all alone and fear finds the perfect ground Bernice

      As i try to find my way through life and all that it comes with, i am reminded of one great legend that has been through this journey of life and has gone through such experiences, leaving words behind that hold great power and hope for me and others. Maya Angelou, a woman with great courage and tenacity. Having faced her fears head on and leaving wise words for us to form  a path of our own  and leave behind a legacy.      Your words touch deep to heal wounds deep rooted into our hearts and souls. You not only found a way to share your life but you have made it possible for me to embrace my individuality and give my best shot at any task thrown my way. Such encouragement is what has become stepping stones to the river called life.      The peace that you left this earth with is the same peace that you lived by everyday,  a peace from deep within that we should all strive towards. You stayed true to your values and opened our minds to greater possibilities.        Maybe death

A shiver runs down my spine, I need that manna of mine, that given with manna and quail, As i look for a scapegoat, i wail, life feels like a bad bet, that i made yet i did not. I wasn't aware, I wasn't even here, As i popped out i cried, should that answer it without all that science of unblocking the lungs? Is the world that bad...? that an innocent should cry when brought forth? I need that manna of mine, that which came without attachment of strings, or did it? they formed a covenant, right? Does that account for the 'free' services or for the 'fee' of the services? Is that what the world has become? a battlefield of some sort? Is that what ME stands for these days Must Endure? Bernice

Has the love bug bit  you yet?... :) its all around on my side. I found one of my first poems while cleaning out my room and decided to share it. Read and enjoy,  Should the sun go down, i want to know that i have my own, you know, that person,that one Should the moon appear, i want to bear, the doings of the day, and have what i care; most without wear, Should the sun rise again, i want to rise and gain, i want my companion of size who i won't complain of Should it get dark, i don't want to fall back, i want to know i have that person who'll have my back, and get me back on track, Should our flower whither, i won't go in and sulk in bitter, i would want to see the rose and not the thorns, as that's what it is about, Should i see the rainbow, i'll ignore the wind blowing, i want to smile coz it's there though it rains, i'll forget the storm  and hold on to beautiful things such as those Bernice

Silence fills me, these four walls cant accomodate me, not my creativity, or my ability, i hear the quiet movement of sand through the hour glass and the footsteps outside the electrical controlled doors, they told me i needed help, for what? i kept asking i simply took the powdery substance they called it cocaine, i say its their imagination tis my pain and gain, 'her love left', they claim i was always alone, i proclaim they just didnt realize, family equated to stone, so cold, doctors say am unstable feelings and proper speech, am unable, flight, i ran from the strange people in lab coats, the nurses and their hats, i stepped in the dark alley, the street lights adjacent to the highway, illuminated stray dogs on the hunt, put a scary chill in me, thinking it would wash the fear away.. i sniff the white powder, i felt it coming... grey and i figured i wouldn't see the sunrise any more                                    bernice

Time goes by fast..i just turned 21 the other day and if my short life has taught me anything is to read, learn and share. I still have  more to learn and experience. These are some of the words that have taken me through the hard times and the good times. 1. Don't be afraid to stand for what you believe in, even if it means standing alone.  -Wayne Dyer For the times when making a descion is a make or break thing 2.Life is just a mirror,and what you see out there, you must first see inside you.   -Wally Amos When you find yourself pointing fingers at everyone else and you forget that the rest of your fingers are pointing right at you. 3. If you don't like where you are, move you are not tree.  -Jim Rohn Stop complaining  and whining at things that you can change. 4.Self is not something one finds but creates.   -Thomas Szasz  When you get hit by identity crisis. 5.The best vitamin to make friends, is B1.  -Anonymous My favourite of them all. :)   Bernice

While looking for a new idea around me, a friend sent me a photo that got me thinking, 'am i wasting my time'. think about it... Are we living our lives trying hard to make a difference yet we are only doing the opposite of it. am i spending my life saving a drowning fish,? are you stuck with someone, who abuses your emotions when all you need to do is put the fish back in the water and let it swim..!

It has been a while and i had a strange writers block that took me more than a year to go past it. So this is for a new year and a new beginning.    Over the past year, i have formed numerous relationships and lost close to the same number, and as a twenty something year old it really is not a shock. As we try to find ourselves you come to the conclusion that, its time i changed the group i hang or with or the people in my life. At times you out grow your childhood friends and get distant with your best friends.  So dealing with all that made me realise i may not have the same reasoning i had back then when i started this blog and over time i have learnt to embrace the person that i am, so should you.Hence the change of the package...  In world where every one tries to fit in  and fall back on their dreams because life happens and time passes you by, i have discovered the importance of taking a break to just stop and smell the roses. Live,Laugh,Love. breathe the fresh air and tak